commercialism nausea

[rivendellrose]

Why companies feel the need to create crappy merchandise for every little damned thing I shall never understand. Ok... well, it's for money, obviously. But I don't understand why people buy it. Here, in public for all to see, is my case against fandom commercialism.

Item 1: The infamous Kia/Lord of the Rings tie-in commercials and deals. Why this is insane: I know I sound like a fool, here, but Tolkien would have gone into a towering fury if he'd lived to see the day that this happened. The man was violently anti-automobile. Any fool who's seen the movie can see aspects of this hatred (*coughs*-Isengard-*coughs*), but it went far beyond that. I know we can't expect New Line to take this into consideration, but I would expect that his estate might have a bit more concern for what his wishes would have been.

Item 2: The abominable action figures. I know a lot of people like action figures. I don't mind this. In fact, some of them are quite nice and well-done. It's the ones that *aren't* well-done that bother me. The ones that, upon looking at them, I can only guess who they must be intended to portray, using the process of elimination and broad (very broad) caricature. And I'm not even going to talk about "Invisibility Cloak Harry." Why not just sell an empty box?

Item 3: Horribly ugly talking plush Gollum. I'm not kidding. It's right here if you really want to see it. I'm thoroughly appalled.

Item 4: Alas... of course Mattel would want to horn in on all this action. But *must* they make "a collectible Barbie and Ken gift set, in the guise of wedding dolls"--a wedding pair the identity of which which I'm sure all those who've read Return of the King???

Needless to say, I shall be avoiding toy stores this fall. I'm just going to pretend these things don't exist, I think. I'm sure the madness that brought us Bloated!Pregnant!Snape is far from finished yet........

Comments

[spazzychic.livejournal.com]

That gollum doll is going to keep me up at night. Jesus. Tolkien would be spinning in his grave.

[theladyfeylene.livejournal.com]

I'm an action figure whore. I've got both Legolas', both Gandolfs, both Frodo's...I even have the hideous Helms Deep Aragorn. But I hide him behind a couple of orcs. I don't have very many Sorcerer's Stone Action figures...just the ones that came out later. I've got Fred and George, and Hagrid. I *do* have both Harry and Ron from CoS, plus Severus and Lockhart. Not to mention countless other Harry Potter crap...

Scratch action figure. I'm a merchandise whore. Honestly...you walk into my bedroom, you'd think a teenage boy lived there...

[rivendellrose.livejournal.com]

Tell me about it. The poor old curmudgeon.... he'd totallly freak out.

[rivendellrose.livejournal.com]

Lol. I have Severus--he was a Christmas present. Poor Severus. Looking at him makes me ill. The friend who gave him to me has Lockhart, who, I admit, looks perfectly fine; not a bad likeness. I feel awfully for poor Alan Rickman if he's ever seen the Snape figure, though......

[spazzychic.livejournal.com]

I can hear His voice booming through the clouds :
"You turned one of the most disturbing, moving and important literary devices in the most popular fantasy genre literature of our time into a PLUSHY!!?" ARMEGEDDON!!

[rivendellrose.livejournal.com]

*Shivers* Actually, I think if He were after raining divine wrath, it would've happened already... unless he's waiting until the whole thing's done, perhaps, to make sure he catches *everything*.......

[spazzychic.livejournal.com]

Well, I mean, if you're gonna destroy the planet, you should do it right.