rivendellrose | fic post

My ongoing effort to get back to writing (fic, in this case) continues. Wheee.

Fandom: HP
Pairing: Snape/Lupin
Summary/Notes: Sixth year, Remus makes some interesting discoveries about himself. Pretty mild, nothing but talk and some kissing. Some mention of masturbation.
Title: "Anticipation"

The day before the full moon was always the hardest... in many ways. Over the years, Remus had grown used to feeling edgy, keyed up and hyperactive, as the call of the moon made his blood rise and everything in his body urge for activity, for action, for life. He ate constantly, craving the proteins and fats that would help his body make the change, and was always thirsty, as though he would parch if he didn't have a glass of water every five minutes through the day, especially as moonrise grew near. He suspected it had something to do with losing water as he changed, although he wasn't sure exactly, and none of the very dry technical books on werewolf anatomy mentioned anything about this.

What he didn't realize until he was thirteen was that his libido responded in the same way as his appetite to the moon's nearness. At twelve, yes, he'd felt edgy in ways he hadn't really expected, but he wasn't accustomed enough to it to really realize the connection. At thirteen... well, he could hardly miss the erection, the fantasies, the less-than-innocent lust that plagued him the day before each full moon. By the time he was sixteen, he had grown to expect it along with every other aspect of the change (and also to expect that it was boys, not girls, who brought on the worst of those feelings) - but by the time the full moon of November rolled around, he found something new. That month, the lusty thoughts brought on by the fullness of the moon focused themselves almost wholely on one person. The most unexpected person of all.

Severus Snape.

He couldn't get the skinny, greasy Slytherin out of his mind. Couldn't stop looking at him in class, couldn't stop the way his mind pulled that scent (herbs and cigarette smoke and musky oils) out of a crowd of students. Remus had read somewhere that wolves in the wild focused on a single animal out of a herd, chosing the individual for prey out of a roiling mass of life. He didn't want to think this was the same, but instinct told him something similar was going on when every sense came to attention each time Severus walked by. And other things were rising to awareness, as well.

"You alright, Moony?"

Remus winced. "No problem, Padfoot. Just forgot my essay in the dorm. You know how I get..."

His friends nodded. Remus was usually a bit distracted the day before the full moon, his energy so high he often forgot things in his rush to move in ten directions at once.

"I'll just go back and grab it, I've got time. I'll meet you in the Great Hall."

"Just don't miss lunch!" James grinned.

Remus laughed. "You know I won't." He patted his already-growling stomach, and his friends laughed, too, knowing all too well his ability to pack away food at this time of the month.

Time of the month... I sound like a bloody girl. Remus shook his head as he hurried down the hallway, but it wasn't parchment that he hunted. As soon as he'd gotten out of view of his friends, he caught sight of his quarry, and his pulse danced in his throat. "Hey, Severus."

His potions partner (Slughorn had been more than happy to pair his worst potions student with one of the best, if it meant lessened frequency of near-disasters in his classroom) rolled his eyes at him. "I can't help you with the test if you don't know anything yet, Lupin. And it's not til after lunch, anyway."

"I know. I was hoping you could... help me with something else."

He must have finally found the right combination of significant tone, lowered voice, and intense expression, because finally, after months of trying during their study sessions, Severus' eyes widened. "You... what?"

Remus bit his lip, then strode forward, doubt evaporating as the wolf's spirit seemed to take over his body, imbuing him with a confidence he himself would normally never have imagined. "Come on, Severus. You can't have really missed it. You're too smart for that."

When the hell had his body learned to walk this way, predatory and sure, with a sensuality he was fairly sure the other boy noticed? Yes... Severus's eyes narrowed for a moment, then one corner of his lips quirked up in a little half-smirk. "You're camp, Lupin, yeah. I know that. Bloody whole school knows that. So why don't you go let Black drag you off in a broom-closet already, like I'm sure he does after all the Quidditch matches."

"'Cause Sirius is straight, for one. And I'm not interested in him like that."

"You're not."

"Nope." They were practically nose to nose, now, or would have been if Remus had been just a few inches taller. As it was he was weirdly pleased to lower his eyes and drink in the look of the long, pale neck that rose above black robes edged in green and silver. Severus' scent washed over him in waves timed to the other boy's heartbeat.

"Then who are you interested in?" Severus sounded almost choked, but when Remus looked up and met his eyes, the other boy seemed to relax a little bit. Maybe staring at someone's neck wasn't the greatest idea, even if they didn't know he was a werewolf.

"You. I want you."

A snort of laughter started out of Severus, but never made it past his throat as Remus closed the distance between them, his right hand catching the other boy's robes and pulling him into a firm kiss that softened and became gentle as it was clear Severus wasn't going to push him away. When they parted for air, a bit of high color and a sparkle in Snape's eyes told Remus he'd made the right interpretation of all the furtive, considering looks he'd caught Snape giving him during their lessons.

"So. What will you do, now?" Severus sounded entirely too amused, but Remus was near giddy himself, so he wasn't about to complain.

"Well... we've got until lunch, haven't we? I told my friends I was going back to the dorm. I'm a horrible liar, so I have a pretty good idea of where we ought to go..."