a hastily-written rant / explanation
Mar. 13th, 2024 10:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rivendellroseIt occurs to me, in the context of a Bingo card for Disco's last season that I saw on Tumblr, that my very complicated feelings for Discovery have mirrored the trajectory of my feelings for Enterprise in almost perfect reverse. Well, except for the whole, like, two decade gap in my Enterprise viewing experience where I watched the pilot, noped the fuck out for nearly 20 years apart from one scene viewed without audio (or, rather, with angsty K-pop audio) in a boba tea shop during college, then came back later and found it exactly what I needed during one of the worst periods of my life.
So... here goes.
When Enterprise originally aired, I was getting burned out on Trek. When Disco originally aired, I was desperate for a new Trek after a long absence of the franchise from television. When Enterprise first aired, I was heading out to college and didn't really need a new Trek anymore. When Disco aired, I was an adult who'd recently lost their first baby and quit my full-time job to move into freelance. I needed a fandom to fill my time.
That said, Enterprise was the Trek that, after leaving it behind in my dust, turned out to the be the Trek that rescued me in my worst hour precisely because there was no new Trek on TV at that time and Enterprise was the only thing I hadn't seen... oh, and, hey, I remembered that weird scene I'd caught in the college boba tea place where I saw that a) the Andorians were finally back and b) Jeff Combs was playing one. Both major inducements. So I dove deep. I initially meant to just watch episodes with Combs (and did), then went back and watched almost the full series because hey, this wasn't nearly as bad as I'd feared and actually got a LOT better over time.
Which brings us back to the way my experiences with Disco and Enterprise exactly mirrored each other, because while Enterprise was a show I came to cautiously, intending only to watch as much as my perennial favorite guest star was in, I found myself falling in love with the whole stupid goddamned thing... Disco was the show that I loved and defended from the minute it was announced, adored every single thing that was announced about it before it aired, insisted that I would love no matter what because it was Mine and also because god damn it I could easily see them doing the same bullshit they did to Nicole Beharie on Sleepy Hollow and I was raring for a fight if they tried.
And, you know, I wound up lasting in that vow of eternal love through the whole first season. A lot of people noped about the darkness and the violence, and I felt more or less fine because, whatever, I cut my teeth on DS9. Dark happens. Violence happens. New era. Trek for adults, whatever. Plus, no one in their right mind walks into a BRYAN FULLER SHOW not expecting violence, and I was sufficiently familiar with his oeuvre to know what to expect thank you very much. Even though by the time the pilot aired I believe he had already hared off on the next shiny thing -- I still know what to expect from something he conceived and plotted, y'know?
I also, although it BROKE MY FUCKING HEART, survived the death of Captain Georgiou, who I had been prepared up to that moment to replace Sisko in my rankings of best captain.
Anyway, through season one, I was ride or die.
And... then things started getting kind of hinky in S2. On the one hand, they... more or less made my weird end-of-S1 crack pairing canon? But they were still teasing the canon pairing? Kind of? But also not? But, hey, my favorite characters from S1 still got a lot of screentime and there was a lot going on, and while the main plots... er... kind of sucked and the writing was... uh... yeah? There were still good moments, anyway. Or at least moments that I thought were good. Things I liked happened in addition to all the things that I... um... really really really hated. Spock existing was one of those things I really really really hated, though, and the whole goddamned season felt like the Spock show.
And then the end of S2 happened and I don't even know what the fuck. But it was like the opposite of the moment where, wow, Enterprise is actually getting pretty good!
And then S3 was like the opposite of the oh wow, Enterprise is finally really getting their shit figured out season! Like, they've figured out that they're a prequel! They're doing the beginnings of the Federation and bringing in the Tellarites and all this stuff, and they're dealing with some really interesting stuff and they might bring Shran on as a main character holy shit!
Meanwhile in the present day... I noped the fuck out of Disco because they'd left everyone I loved behind and I didn't recognize a goddamned thing anymore except I guess Oded Fehr. I did recognize him. And David Cronenburg I guess. And the Seventh Doctor. Why the fuck is he here, anyway? Meanwhile they've turned the emperor into a character that even I, lover of pretty much everything Michelle Yeoh has ever done, cannot stand, Tilly is now boring and annoying, Saru... is giving Doug Jones a very nice quiet latex-covered semi-retirement I guess and apparently getting a romance arc, and I can't even remember why Anthony Rapp is here most days except I still love him. Oh, and Tig Notaro is here perpetually confusing me because she reminds me of my second cousin. But she's also not really here. And boy are we spending a lot of time with these two new Zoomer kids and some bridge crew that I've never given a damn about. Glad they finally got around to character development I guess? Also the future is fucking stupid and I find Michael's new boyfriend way too Chosen One Special Boy. No, I'm not at all grumpy because I was in love with her ex. I now ship her ex with his former lover / former torturer and you left them both behind and I will never forgive you for that, never ever ever, I love them to the depths of my stupid heart because I am weak and they are very very pretty and very very broken in ways that call to my soul. Um. What was I saying?
So now we're in the Long Dark Teatime of the No I Refuse to Give a Fuck About That Show Anymore, But Let Me Show You My Feelings About Where It Went Wrong. Also known as the point we arrive at today. Wherein because of the internet and also the fact that I am not a busy college student but instead a mostly stay-at-home mom who uses the internet to distract myself when I want to chew my own arm off, I hear things, and I see things, and, due to having imprinted hard on the first season of Disco, I care too much. Tumblr is now the boba tea place of my soul, and I see random gifsets and things and... well, mostly get angry and occasionally say things like "Of course Callum Keith Rennie is going to turn out evil, who do you think you're dealing with? And yes, I suspect that David Cronenburg is an android, you're right! But WHY ARE WE STILL TALKING ABOUT ALL THE ZOOMERS?!" (Why? Well, because I'm OLD, that's why. Yes, I do identify mostly with the adults in the room. And yet please also talk to me about how much I hated the Picard series...)
So... here we are. Discovery's final fifth season draws nigh, and I am left here looking at Bingo cards and bitterly muttering, "Well, yes, it would be quite nice if we could stop in on the 32nd century Klingons, but only if you have the sense to bring in Mary Chieffo as L'Rell's umpteen-billionth great-granddaughter because I'm still mad at you for leaving her behind, and also if you'd had any sense and not ditched them all in the 23rd century we could have had at least a FEW more guest spots from Kenneth Mitchell before he died. Also also does ANYONE know when Shazad Latif's new Nautilus series is supposed to show up on Disney+, because I need his face."
Do not speak to me of the supposed Section 31 series, oh wait I mean movie I guess what the fuck no, please tell me that will not happen. I cannot abide it. Please also don't speak to me about Strange New Worlds, because I was doing okay with it on YouTube while it was free and Anson Mount is pretty darned adorable and I like some of the other cast okay, but then I realized they were going to KILL THE FUCKING AENAR, and the ONLY thing (AGAIN) that had brought me back (I AM VERY CONSISTENT) WAS THE FACT THAT THEY BROUGHT THE AENAR BACK. But then they didn't animate his antennae so I kept feeling like he was broken somehow AND ALSO THEY FUCKING KILLED HIM FOR NO GODDAMNED REASON. So no! I am done! No more! You will not get me back, you absolute bastards!
Lifelong relationship with a fandom is... hard.
I'll try to post something real someday soon. I just wanted to put this here because it feels like full-circle given how I started out with Disco here.
So... here goes.
When Enterprise originally aired, I was getting burned out on Trek. When Disco originally aired, I was desperate for a new Trek after a long absence of the franchise from television. When Enterprise first aired, I was heading out to college and didn't really need a new Trek anymore. When Disco aired, I was an adult who'd recently lost their first baby and quit my full-time job to move into freelance. I needed a fandom to fill my time.
That said, Enterprise was the Trek that, after leaving it behind in my dust, turned out to the be the Trek that rescued me in my worst hour precisely because there was no new Trek on TV at that time and Enterprise was the only thing I hadn't seen... oh, and, hey, I remembered that weird scene I'd caught in the college boba tea place where I saw that a) the Andorians were finally back and b) Jeff Combs was playing one. Both major inducements. So I dove deep. I initially meant to just watch episodes with Combs (and did), then went back and watched almost the full series because hey, this wasn't nearly as bad as I'd feared and actually got a LOT better over time.
Which brings us back to the way my experiences with Disco and Enterprise exactly mirrored each other, because while Enterprise was a show I came to cautiously, intending only to watch as much as my perennial favorite guest star was in, I found myself falling in love with the whole stupid goddamned thing... Disco was the show that I loved and defended from the minute it was announced, adored every single thing that was announced about it before it aired, insisted that I would love no matter what because it was Mine and also because god damn it I could easily see them doing the same bullshit they did to Nicole Beharie on Sleepy Hollow and I was raring for a fight if they tried.
And, you know, I wound up lasting in that vow of eternal love through the whole first season. A lot of people noped about the darkness and the violence, and I felt more or less fine because, whatever, I cut my teeth on DS9. Dark happens. Violence happens. New era. Trek for adults, whatever. Plus, no one in their right mind walks into a BRYAN FULLER SHOW not expecting violence, and I was sufficiently familiar with his oeuvre to know what to expect thank you very much. Even though by the time the pilot aired I believe he had already hared off on the next shiny thing -- I still know what to expect from something he conceived and plotted, y'know?
I also, although it BROKE MY FUCKING HEART, survived the death of Captain Georgiou, who I had been prepared up to that moment to replace Sisko in my rankings of best captain.
Anyway, through season one, I was ride or die.
And... then things started getting kind of hinky in S2. On the one hand, they... more or less made my weird end-of-S1 crack pairing canon? But they were still teasing the canon pairing? Kind of? But also not? But, hey, my favorite characters from S1 still got a lot of screentime and there was a lot going on, and while the main plots... er... kind of sucked and the writing was... uh... yeah? There were still good moments, anyway. Or at least moments that I thought were good. Things I liked happened in addition to all the things that I... um... really really really hated. Spock existing was one of those things I really really really hated, though, and the whole goddamned season felt like the Spock show.
And then the end of S2 happened and I don't even know what the fuck. But it was like the opposite of the moment where, wow, Enterprise is actually getting pretty good!
And then S3 was like the opposite of the oh wow, Enterprise is finally really getting their shit figured out season! Like, they've figured out that they're a prequel! They're doing the beginnings of the Federation and bringing in the Tellarites and all this stuff, and they're dealing with some really interesting stuff and they might bring Shran on as a main character holy shit!
Meanwhile in the present day... I noped the fuck out of Disco because they'd left everyone I loved behind and I didn't recognize a goddamned thing anymore except I guess Oded Fehr. I did recognize him. And David Cronenburg I guess. And the Seventh Doctor. Why the fuck is he here, anyway? Meanwhile they've turned the emperor into a character that even I, lover of pretty much everything Michelle Yeoh has ever done, cannot stand, Tilly is now boring and annoying, Saru... is giving Doug Jones a very nice quiet latex-covered semi-retirement I guess and apparently getting a romance arc, and I can't even remember why Anthony Rapp is here most days except I still love him. Oh, and Tig Notaro is here perpetually confusing me because she reminds me of my second cousin. But she's also not really here. And boy are we spending a lot of time with these two new Zoomer kids and some bridge crew that I've never given a damn about. Glad they finally got around to character development I guess? Also the future is fucking stupid and I find Michael's new boyfriend way too Chosen One Special Boy. No, I'm not at all grumpy because I was in love with her ex. I now ship her ex with his former lover / former torturer and you left them both behind and I will never forgive you for that, never ever ever, I love them to the depths of my stupid heart because I am weak and they are very very pretty and very very broken in ways that call to my soul. Um. What was I saying?
So now we're in the Long Dark Teatime of the No I Refuse to Give a Fuck About That Show Anymore, But Let Me Show You My Feelings About Where It Went Wrong. Also known as the point we arrive at today. Wherein because of the internet and also the fact that I am not a busy college student but instead a mostly stay-at-home mom who uses the internet to distract myself when I want to chew my own arm off, I hear things, and I see things, and, due to having imprinted hard on the first season of Disco, I care too much. Tumblr is now the boba tea place of my soul, and I see random gifsets and things and... well, mostly get angry and occasionally say things like "Of course Callum Keith Rennie is going to turn out evil, who do you think you're dealing with? And yes, I suspect that David Cronenburg is an android, you're right! But WHY ARE WE STILL TALKING ABOUT ALL THE ZOOMERS?!" (Why? Well, because I'm OLD, that's why. Yes, I do identify mostly with the adults in the room. And yet please also talk to me about how much I hated the Picard series...)
So... here we are. Discovery's final fifth season draws nigh, and I am left here looking at Bingo cards and bitterly muttering, "Well, yes, it would be quite nice if we could stop in on the 32nd century Klingons, but only if you have the sense to bring in Mary Chieffo as L'Rell's umpteen-billionth great-granddaughter because I'm still mad at you for leaving her behind, and also if you'd had any sense and not ditched them all in the 23rd century we could have had at least a FEW more guest spots from Kenneth Mitchell before he died. Also also does ANYONE know when Shazad Latif's new Nautilus series is supposed to show up on Disney+, because I need his face."
Do not speak to me of the supposed Section 31 series, oh wait I mean movie I guess what the fuck no, please tell me that will not happen. I cannot abide it. Please also don't speak to me about Strange New Worlds, because I was doing okay with it on YouTube while it was free and Anson Mount is pretty darned adorable and I like some of the other cast okay, but then I realized they were going to KILL THE FUCKING AENAR, and the ONLY thing (AGAIN) that had brought me back (I AM VERY CONSISTENT) WAS THE FACT THAT THEY BROUGHT THE AENAR BACK. But then they didn't animate his antennae so I kept feeling like he was broken somehow AND ALSO THEY FUCKING KILLED HIM FOR NO GODDAMNED REASON. So no! I am done! No more! You will not get me back, you absolute bastards!
Lifelong relationship with a fandom is... hard.
I'll try to post something real someday soon. I just wanted to put this here because it feels like full-circle given how I started out with Disco here.
no subject
Date: 2024-03-16 02:17 pm (UTC)I, I got nothin'.
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Date: 2024-03-16 11:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-03-16 11:24 pm (UTC)